I can see clearly now

Today was just one of those days (I seem to be having a lot of those lately). Everything went wrong – from screwing up the self-checkout at Wal-Mart to spewing Dr. Pepper all over the kitchen and everything in between. There were time when I just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry like a baby.

A good thing finally happened, though. I got a brand-new 17″ flat screen monitor! My old monitor was dying a slow, horrible death and was getting to the point where I could barely read anything. But thanks to my stepmom and a power outage, I’m sitting here looking at a crisp, bright, readable screen. Who knew a simple monitor could be so uplifting?

Early this morning, our power went out twice. My stepmom had forgotten to turn their computer off last night, and when she went to turn it back on after the power outage to make sure everything was okay, the monitor wouldn’t come on at all. I took a look at it and couldn’t make it work, either. So, she called my dad and told him that if he wanted to do anything on that computer tonight (he has a laptop, too), he should probably stop and buy a new monitor on his way home.

He didn’t bring anything in when he came home, so I assumed he didn’t buy a new monitor. He went back to his room for a while, and then came back and told me he fixed his monitor. All he did was unplug it for a minute and it worked. Then he looked at me and said, “Now I have to take a monitor back to the store – unless you know somebody who wants to buy one.”

Me: Well, if I had a job, I would buy it from you. You know I need one.
Stepmom: Do you think you’ll ever get another job?
Me: I sure hope so! I’m so tired of being here.
Stepmom: (to Dad) Maybe we could go ahead and give it to her, and then take low monthly payments on it when she gets a job.
Dad: It’s in the car, go get it when you’re ready.

So, that’s how I ended up with this monitor. I sure wasn’t expecting it! My dad told me later on that he normally would have come home and checked it out before buying another one, but he knew I needed one so he went ahead and got it. So, I guess that was their plan all along. They rock!

Feed me, Seymour

Let me apologize in advance for all the whining and bitching contained in this post.

It’s one-freaking-thirty in the morning, and I’m still awake. I didn’t get to sleep until after 4 AM yesterday, and was up by 8. Yes, folks, my insomnia is back with a vengance. I’ve been running on little to no sleep for almost two weeks now, and it’s beginning to take it’s toll on me. I’m hard to get along with when I’m tired. I don’t even like myself when I’m like this.

Stress is causing this, that much I know. It seems like my life is falling apart, and there’s nothing I can do about it. I need a job. I can’t even go look for a job again until school starts back. That takes care of Gracie, but even then I still don’t have anywhere to leave Arien. It’s kinda hard to put in applications and chase a two year old at the same time.

Being unemployed also means that I am stuck here in this house all the time. I’m so sick of looking at this place! Sure, I could leave for a while, but where would I go? My mom’s house? She’s not exactly the most pleasant person in the world, and I would just leave there in an even worse mood. Driving around is out of the question – I can’t afford to waste gas.

Yes, I’m having one of those “poor me” moments. I know that things could be worse – they have been before, and they probably will be again before it’s over with – I just want things to go my way for once.

And, to add to my bad mood, I’m hungry and there’s not a thing in this house I want to eat. We have plenty of food, it’s just that none of it looks good right now. I want some of those nachos like I used to get at my brother’s little league baseball games. Just some cheese sauce over some chips with jalapeno slices on top. Lots of jalapeno slices. I might feel better if I had that, but there’s no way I’m getting any nachos tonight, so I’m just going to sit here and be cranky until I finally fall asleep.

Merry Christmas!

I’ve been sick all day, so I don’t feel much like posting anything. I just wanted to wish everyone a happy holiday! I’ve done my Santa duties, and now I’m off to bed. I hope I feel better in the morning – I want to enjoy watching the girls open their presents.

Good night!

Success!

The cookies turned out okay. They certainly weren’t the best I’ve ever eaten, but they were better than chips ahoy. We’re blessed with cookies now – I made 4 dozen!

I used to hate cooking, but I’ve been enjoying it since I haven’t been working. I’d rather make real meals instead of baking, though. Before I was unemployed, I had a few things that I would make every now and then, but other than that I cooked those boxed dinners a lot. I’ve found that I like making things homemade – they just taste better! I’ve made everything from easy chicken quesadillas to tuna noodle casserole to swedish meatballs.

My favorite thing to cook (and eat), though, is a quick and easy dish called “hot dog pan barbeque”. The recipe is from an old Nathan’s Famous hot dog cookbook that someone gave my dad. I usually fix mashed potates and macaroni and cheese to go with it, and it’s quick meal that my kids love. The recipe is in the extended entry.

A disaster waiting to happen

I’m going to bake some cookies. Real, homemade cookies, not the kind you just cut apart and pop into the oven. I’ve never baked anything before, not counting pakaged cake mixes and the like, so this should be interesting.

I’m about to take Gracie to stay the night with my mom, then I’m going to (attempt to) get my bake on! Wish me luck, I’m gonna need it.

Busy, busy, busy

There has been so much going on around here lately, I’ve barely even had time to think! I’m not going to go into detail on any of it now, because I’m just taking a break from wrapping presents. I have to post something, though, so I’ll give a little summary.

Wayne and I had to go to court over child support on the 17th. He never showed up, and was sentenced to 6 months in jail. More on this later.

On the same day, I talked to the District Manager about getting my job back. I still haven’t heard anything from him, but that’s nothing unusual. He has a tendency to forget things. I plan on calling him first thing Monday morning.

Gracie was in her first play on Sunday night. We only had a week to get ready, but she actually learned her lines. She did them well in practice, but didn’t get to say them during the actual performance. She was an angel and her lines were, “For unto you is born this day in the City of David, a savior, which is Christ the Lord.” She didn’t even come on stage during this part! I thought maybe she was just scared or something, but it turned out that her halo wasn’t on straight, and she wouldn’t go out there until someone fixed it for her! I swear, that kid is too picky for her own good.

I spent most of yesterday rearranging my bedroom to accomodate the computer desk I’m getting from my dad for Christmas. I nearly killed myself while trying to move dresser-zilla. I wish my sister would come get it- it’s just in my way. It’s drawers are full of her stuff, so it’s not like I get any use out of it. I finally go it moved to where I wanted it though, and it’s amazing how big this room looks now.

This morning, I went to the dentist, and he referred me to an oral surgeon to have my wisdom teeth taken out. Then, we went to my Granny’s house to eat lunch and let the girls open their presents from her. My first child support check in over a year came in the mail today. It was for $400, and I went out and finished my Christmas shopping for the girls.

Now, I’m about halfway through wrapping presents. I love doing that. I even wrap the “Santa” ones, and some of the stocking stuffers. I use different paper for those, of course!

Ice from Hell & other stuff

I just love how kids get things all mixed up when you try to explain something to them. Sometimes their little mix-ups give me a much needed laugh and brighten my day.

We got a little bit of hail this morning, and my dad tried to explain it to Gracie. He told her that it was ice that fell from the sky, and it was called hail. A couple of hours after that, Gracie and I were wrapping presents, and she just happened to look out the door and notice it was hailing again. She looked at me and said, “Look Mama, it’s ice from Hell!”

I know I’m not very good at telling stories, but that was truly hilarious. I laughed at her, and she got mad. I did my best to try and straighten her out on the issue. I think she understands it now.

I still haven’t found a job. I had to take Arien out of daycare, so I’ve been staying home with her. It’s driving me nuts! I just don’t see how all the stay at home mom’s do it. I get so sick of looking at this place. I’ve been cleaning and knitting to keep myself occupied.

I’ve been meaning to work on this site, too, but I can’t really do anything while Arien is here. My computer is in my bedroom, and my room is nowhere near Arien proof. She likes to explore, and I’m afraid she’ll get hurt on something in here. My computer isn’t safe around her, either. She likes to push buttons, and she’s messed this old computer up more than once.