Moving on

First of all, I know I sounded like a stupid little girl in that last post. I should probably delete it, but I’m not going to. I want to leave it there because it’s how I really feel, not some manufactured me that I usually pretend to be when I post. I’m going to try to be more “me” on this blog from now on.

Now, back to the original purpose of this post. I’ve bought another domain. I wasn’t going to, but I miss having my own site, so I couldn’t resist. I haven’t had time to do anything with it yet, but I’m going to start on that in the morning. So, in the near future I’m going to be blogging at briehasissues.com. Yay!

I would like to start working on it tonight, but I’m just too tired. We’ve been out running around since Andrew got back from cleaning out his car. We mostly drove around looking for old cemeteries to explore. Most people might think we’re strange for doing that, but we enjoy it. But I’m beat, and I’m heading off to bed. Goodnight!

Jealousy

You know, I’d love to be able to say that I’m not a jealous girlfriend, but then I’d be lying. I’m not like some people I know who get pissed off whenever a girl (even family!) is near her man, but I do get pretty upset over some girls. The thing is, I just don’t let anyone know it.

Andrew has a lot of female friends. Most of them I don’t worry about. There’s one that I do worry about, though. The one he used to date that keeps trying to hook up with him again. But that’s not even what this post is about.

His best friend is a girl, and most of the time it seems that he’d rather be with her than with me. We went to Coolidge Park in Chattanooga yesterday, and he spent the whole day walking around with her. When the kids rode the carousel, he wanted to ride too but said he didn’t have anyone to ride with. I told him I would ride, and he said, “I wanted A… to ride with me.” We were out running around today, and he said he was going to take the kids and I home so he could clean out his car. The girl was here when we pulled up, and he said, “Oh, A.. can ride with me to clean out my car!” WTF? He wanted to bring us home to get rid of us. I would have gladly went and helped him, but he’d rather she go.

How can I not be jealous of that? He makes me feel like shit. It always feels like he’d rather be with anyone but me. If that’s what it is, why is he even with me? I’m beginning to think it would be so much easier to just let him go and be alone. I love him so much and I don’t want to lose him, but I don’t want to be in another one-sided relationship. What am I supposed to do?